since i assume everyone who reads this is a nerd, you all know who terry gross is. but who is tavi? tavi is a 13yo fashion blogging wunderkind whose “style” has inexplicably served as muse for designers, and for a while there, she was kinda a big deal in the fashion world. she was like the justin bieber of fashion writing

the tavi phenomenon was particularly ridiculous because 1) her blogging was mediocre at best, and 2) her outfits sorta sucked. at age 11 when she started, she was definitely 5 years ahead of her time in writing ability. i’d even say she writes better than most adults. HOWEVER, no matter how impressive the feat for a newly minted tween, i still don’t want to read a spastic 16yo write about the stupid oversized sweater she wore over a clashing blazer with some ridiculous leggings and neon shoes.

secondly, her outfits are garbage. 11yo’s tend to be tiny, and tiny people have the luxury of wearing a ton of shit layered upon each other, and calling it an outfit. you know what happens when girls with big boobs try to do that? we look fat. when tiny people do it, they are muses. F THAT.

i’m a bit late on the tavi rant (she peaked a while ago), but this whole terry gross thing had me thinking about how stupid people can be. add another item onto that list.

i hear it’s a crowded, drunken mess, but obama and co. are guaranteed to be there for at least 5 minutes. can’t wait to bathe in his light.

more importantly, let’s talk about the dress and accessories. mama Go brought me one of her twice-worn designer gowns from michigan. it’s a black issey miyake (japanese. reppin the asians), and i believe it retailed for $2,000-3,000. why would anyone spend that much money on a dress? i dunno. mama Go paid $300 or so for it at the department store formerly known as hudsons, so whatevs.

mama Go was worried that the dress would be too long on me since 1) it was too long for her and 2) i’m shorter than her. however, b/c i’m “bigger boned” than mom, i filled the dress in a little better, and poof! not too long anymore. disaster averted.

and yes that’s a jean jacket. and no you likely will not convince me not to wear it.

also some words on this “photo shoot” i did of … myself. first, i probably took 100 or so photos. i’m vain and i’m ok w/ it. and you see that ridiculous light there? that’s a lamp w/ the lampshade off leaned against an ikea chair in an awkward attempt to create adequate lighting for a no-flash scenario with a really crappy point-and-shoot camera. i just wish i could have set up a better backdrop. my corkboard disaster zone of receipts and birthday cards screams “declasse.”

next, shoes are nicole miller from DSW in boston. they are the hotness, but i might fall and die in them. ::crosses fingers::

lastly, i need all your advice. accessories? at first i thought a fancy long necklace would be cool, then i thought maybe it would make the whole look too hippie dippy. but a short necklace might be a little too goth/boring (depending on its color) for my taste. i was thinking big gaudy earrings instead. help!

holy crap now i’ll actually have to watch it.

premieres tonight at 9pm on bravo.

i hope he’s not a total douche, although will any of us troyalty really be that surprised if he is?

forget shaggy hair and black eyeliner. i want a band to be really different and look like a bunch of frat boys: short-sleeve polo, ratty loose jeans, flip flops, and a forward-facing, curved-rim baseball hat. stop being an accidental parody of yourself. do it on purpose.
i’m serious. i’d listen to that band.

imagine a room full of people who really, really want to be photographed by a the eminent fashion chronicler of our time. they look just like the photos on the wall—which *NEWSFLASH* is exactly why you won’t be photographed any time soon. why would he want to take pics of an outfit he’s already seen?

for the record, i wore an off-the-rack number—complete with ratty nine west loafers and tights, classy horizontal-stripe jcrew turtleneck (my favorite cotton/polyester blend), and an itchy black wool french connection dress.

i got some pics of the guy and some quasi beautiful people. that’s right buddy. i’m taking a pic of your overtanned, surprisingly small-statured existence.

i’m not going to post any more pics of the people there (that’s exactly what they want), but you can bet there were plenty of pocket squares, fake glasses, berets, and ironically mismatched prints.

i will, however, post pictures of these business cards i gathered from the floor of the stairwell.

if you can’t read the tag line, it says, “moving forward by thinking backwards.” what does this mean? what does this guy do? the answer is nothing, on both counts. these are fake business cards for a man who has no real job, who apparently runs an “online magazine” (read: half-ass blog) that was created because he was “all to [sic] tired of magazines that deal with celebrities and socialites alike to whom are interesting in their own right but in my eyes aren’t the ones that need the limelight 24/7.” huh? i repeat: found these on the floor.

the concept of the blog is so simple it hurts: run around fabulous cities and take pictures of beautifully dressed people. the guy who runs it is one of time magazine’s “top 100 design influencers” (whatever that means) and is generally very famous in the fashion world now.

there is an open reception tonight, and i might as well go check out the scene. i’m not sure why i’d go look at 8 1/2×11 prints of the photos i can already see from the comfort of my own home/computer screen, but i suppose it’s good to be part of the world every once in a while. maybe i’ll run into some protesters.

and seriously, what’s with my newfound artsy fartsy interests? don’t worry, i’m keeping it real w/ a jeopardy marathon later and three flag football games this weekend. word.